piratefiction Chapter 72 2 Lang Shen, Your Dog Food Needs More Money
Chapter 72 2 Lang Shen, Your Dog Food Needs More Money
Chu Jiang looked at the line of text on his phone screen and tapped his finger on the table.
He turned his phone screen toward the V next to him.
"V, see this? Customer feedback."
"Although it was a positive review, it mentioned product defects."
V's holographic projection pushed up the gold-rimmed glasses on his nose, and a line of data slid across the lenses.
"Yes, boss. 'Getting food stuck in your teeth' is a negative experience and will affect customer repurchase rates."
Chu Jiang nodded, behaving like a product manager.
"It's not a big problem; it can be optimized."
He gave the order to the air.
"Reply to 'Erlang Zhenjun loves to slack off'."
"Tell me that the 'meat bone' is a handmade custom piece made from a rare, millennium-old limited edition ingredient, making it extremely rare."
The mechanical sound of V rang out.
"Do we need to attach a product ingredient analysis report and the Corpse King's biography?"
"No need for that complicated process." Chu Jiang waved his hand. "Just tell him that high-end customization will cost extra."
A virtual keyboard appeared on V's projection, and fingers flew across it.
"How much?"
"Considering he's a long-time customer, I'll round it down and give him a friendly price: 8,888 Yin Virtue Points."
Chu Jiang added.
"Give him another 10% off coupon, he can use it next time he orders custom pet treats."
"Please remember to note that this product is a 'trial version,' so taste issues are unavoidable."
"Upgrading to the 'No Food Getting Stuck in Teeth V2.0' version requires a deposit and production will commence upon order placement. We also offer various add-on packages such as 'Beautifying Hair,' 'Strengthening Bones,' and 'Enhancing Intelligence.' Please consult customer service for details."
V. The operation is completed quickly.
"Boss, the bill and product brochures have been sent."
In the square, the group of extraordinary individuals who had almost scraped the ground three feet off for the "Marrow Cleansing Pill" finally gave up.
They searched every inch of the ashes but couldn't find the so-called "BOSS core certificate".
The little fox, Hu Xiaoyao, who was crying with tears streaming down her face, mustered up her courage and walked to the entrance of the milk tea shop, asking timidly.
"Dean Chu... that... Marrow Cleansing Pill..."
Chu Jiang picked up a freshly made "Forget-the-River Mojito" and took a sip.
"Oh, you mean that?"
He pointed to the large crater blasted into the center of the square.
"The raw materials were contaminated, and the quality was substandard."
"I had someone take care of it."
Hu Xiaoyao and the other monsters who had gathered around all wore expressions of heartbreak.
That's a Marrow Cleansing Pill! A legendary treasure!
That's how it was... disposed of?
"Our products from 'Santu Express' are guaranteed to be of the highest quality."
Chu glanced at them.
"If defective products are shipped out, it will damage our brand."
"The key to this event is participation; it tests everyone's teamwork and sense of contribution to the city."
"Stop thinking about shortcuts all the time."
After he finished speaking, he turned his gaze to the Red Boy in the corner, who was hugging a delivery uniform and looked utterly dejected.
"What are you standing there for?"
"The first order has arrived, and the customer is getting impatient."
Red Boy was startled, looking at the milk tea Chu Jiang handed him, and the printed order form.
[Client: Erlang Zhenjun loves to slack off]
【Product: Wangchuan Sprite (Extra Large, Extra Ice)】
[Address: Guard Room No. 3, Tianting Guanjiangkou Community Service Center]
[Note: Hurry up, I'm thirsty.]
Red Boy's eye twitched.
Is it really being sent to Yang Jian?
"Boss, this address... is a bit far."
"My Wind and Fire Wheels are restricted by license plate number; I can't fly to Heaven today."
Chu Jiang pulled a small silver badge from under the bar and tossed it over.
"Exclusive pass for top-performing delivery riders of 'Santu Express'".
"Certified by the Transportation Commission of the Three Realms, ignoring any traffic restrictions and license plate number limits, enjoy VIP priority lanes."
"One minute overtime will deduct 10 points of good karma. Giving a bad review will deduct 100 points."
Red Boy clutched the badge, which was still warm to the touch, and looked at the milk tea in his hand, feeling as if he had just taken a hot potato.
He gritted his teeth, changed into his khaki delivery uniform, grabbed the milk tea, and rushed out.
"I will definitely give it a five-star review!"
A burst of fire shot into the sky and disappeared into the horizon in an instant.
Chu Jiang nodded in satisfaction. This is called the rational use of resources.
Just then, Li the coder's holographic projection popped up again, with a strange expression on his face.
"Boss, what about Longhu Mountain..."
"What, you've come to your senses and are planning to drop out en masse?"
"No." Li, the programmer, shook his head and pulled up a data report. "They did register, but..."
"That Supreme Elder named Zhang Jing'an has started frantically doing tasks on our app."
On the screen, records of Yin De credit points being credited were rapidly updated.
[User 'Poor Taoist Zhang Jing'an' helped an elderly woman cross the road, +0.5 points]
[User "贫道张静安" reported a zombie parking violation in the residential area, +1 point]
[User "贫道张静安" participated in the community's waste sorting knowledge quiz and passed with full marks, +2 points]
Chu Jiang looked at the densely packed score records and smiled.
"That's quite an awareness."
"This old Taoist priest has humbled himself and started to integrate into the community."
Li the programmer's expression became even stranger.
"Boss, he... he seems to treat doing missions like a form of spiritual practice."
"Our backend monitoring just detected that he got into a fight with an elder of the Qingcheng Sect at Binjiang Park in order to grab a task to 'persuade square dancing aunties to lower their volume'."
Chu Jiang rubbed his temples.
This generation of cultivators, when they curl up, are more terrifying than monsters.
"Increase the difficulty of the task."
"Tomorrow, issue an S-rank mission: 'Assist relevant departments in recovering fines for cross-dimensional smuggling.' The target is Lucifer in the Western Hell, and the reward is 3,000 Yin Virtue Points. Let them collect it."
"Yes, boss."
Li Makong accepted the order, and the projection disappeared.
Just as Chu Jiang was about to have some peace and quiet, his personal cell phone rang.
It is an encrypted unknown number.
He answered the call and turned on speakerphone.
A cold, emotionless synthesized electronic voice came out.
"Chu Jiang?"
"It's me, who is it?"
Who we are is not important.
The other party got straight to the point.
"The Celestial Master's Seal of Longhu Mountain is in your hands."
This is not a question, it is a statement.
"Oh, you mean that copper lump?" Chu Jiang picked up the Celestial Master's Seal from the bar and tossed it in his hand. "Yeah, what's wrong with it? It's quite useful as a paperweight."
There was a few seconds of silence on the other end of the phone.
Name your price.
"We want to buy it."
Chu Jiang smiled.
"I'm sorry, this is important evidence in our underworld's anti-monopoly investigation, and it's not for sale."
"Ten quadrillion merit points".
The electronic voice announced an astronomical figure.
Chu Jiang stopped tossing the Celestial Master's Seal.
He placed the Celestial Master's Seal on the table and carefully examined the patterns on it.
"This isn't about money."
"This is a matter of principle."
"Fifty quadrillion." The other party raised the price again, his tone revealing impatience. "This is our final offer. A broken seal isn't worth this price."
Chu Jiang tapped the Celestial Master's Seal with his finger.
"It's definitely not worth the price."
"But something that's making you all so anxious is worth the price."
Who are you?
"Since when has it become the business of those who hide in the shadows to interfere in the affairs of the underworld?"
Silence fell again on the other end of the phone.
After a long while, the electronic voice sounded again, with an indescribable meaning in it.
"Chu Jiang, do you think you can do whatever you want in the mortal world just because you defeated Longhu Mountain?"
"The water beneath your feet is deeper than you imagine."
"The Celestial Master's Seal seals more than just one drought demon."
"It is a key."
Chu Jiang narrowed his eyes.
"Go on."
"Some doors, once closed, are best left unopened."
"You're playing with fire by holding the key."
"Beep...beep...beep..."
The other party hung up the phone unilaterally.
Chu Jiang stared thoughtfully at the blacked-out phone screen.
He picked up the Celestial Master's Seal, immersed his divine sense into it, and examined it carefully.
Inside the seal, besides the remaining imprints of Longhu Mountain's magical power and the command to release the drought demon that V had deciphered, there was indeed something deeper hidden.
It was an extremely complex set of spatial coordinates, wrapped in more than a dozen ancient restrictions.
The coordinates point to a place that is not anywhere in the mortal realm.
Rather, it is a kind of... chaotic gap that exists between Yin and Yang, yet does not belong to any of the Three Realms.
Just as Chu Jiang was trying to break the restrictions, the door of the milk tea shop was pushed open again.
An old Taoist priest, dressed in a tattered robe and reeking of alcohol, staggered in.
He plopped down in front of the bar and slammed an empty gourd onto the table.
"Boss, bring some tea."
"I want the most expensive one."
Chu Jiang looked up at him.
The visitor was none other than Zhang Jing'an, the Supreme Elder of Longhu Mountain.
However, at this moment, he no longer had any air of otherworldly elegance; instead, he resembled a down-on-his-luck street drunkard.
Chu Jiang poured him a glass of plain water.
"Our most expensive drink, 'Reincarnation Spring,' costs 9,998 units of merit per cup."
"Thank you for your kindness."
Zhang Jing'an picked up her water glass, drank it all in one gulp, and then let out a long burp.
His eyes were bloodshot as he stared intently at Chu Jiang.
"Who exactly are you?"